We are one week away from it being 9 months since my husband’s company did a “reorganization” and did away with his division. I’ve had so many emotions during this seemingly hard time that we’re going through as a family. Brian has been so positive and has relied on God’s timing so heavily, while I’ve been worrying, crying, praying, wondering, expectant and the list goes on… During this time, God has revealed more to me than I ever even imagined was possible. Every single morning I wake up and pray and get in the word, a simple verse comes to life, literally off the pages and blows me away. We’re talking basic, simple concepts coming to life in a whole new way. I just sit there with my jaw on the floor like “how could I have missed this my whole life?” or “how have I read this, and yet never heard it this way before?” When they say the Word is alive, they’re FOR REAL! It has come to life in front of my very eyes in a way that is so hard to describe because there just really aren’t any words. Maybe I can describe it as a feeling, like feeling like I just woke up for the first time in decades and am seeing everything new, for the first time. And that is so our God! It is so Him!
Several months back Jonathan Cahn spoke at our church. I had never heard of him before. He’s well-known for his book The Harbinger. Since then, I’ve listened to/read ALL of his books. He is a Jewish Rabbi who God has revealed so many “mysteries” to. In learning about all of these very very simple concepts of the Jewish culture, I now understand who Jesus is as a person, what He really meant when he spoke, I understand the prophecy of Isaiah and how real his gift was and that it was ONLY a gift from God. In understanding these basics, it all comes together in a way that has brought me in a closer relationship with my creator, has allowed me more empathy for others and has made my heart sync closer to His heart.
A quick example of a concept I NEVER considered, Bethleham. Where did the sacrificial lambs offered up in the temple come from? Bethlehem. It’s in close proximity to the Holy City, it has hills and valleys conducive for sheep, and it’s where the lambs for the Temple were raised. That’s why Messiah was born in Bethlehem. The Lamb of God was born in the place where the lambs were born, not just lambs, but sacrificial lambs. And that’s why the first ones to see Him in the world were the shepards. (from Jonathan Cahn’s “The Book of Mysteries”) AND my mind is blown! You see? How amazing is our God? How alive is this book that he gave us?
Also during this time, actually longer, it’s been over a year and a half, I haven’t been right. My hormones have been off, and my body simply could not balance itself after I stopped nursing Ella. I gained weight for no reason, and there has been nothing that I could do to feel normal, like myself. Again, I’m on multiple journeys here and perhaps that’s why this situation has been harder on me. God told me that He would heal me, but not through medical doctors. Well, when you don’t have corporate insurance, ‘real doctors’ are out of the question, so that solved that for Him- ha! Through friends, I found a homeopathic doctor. I literally interviewed her before I set foot in her office. I prayed and prayed and prayed over that appointment. You know what I walked out with? Iodine. I don’t have thyroid issues according the bloodwork, however the signals that my body is sending me has been saying “iodine deficiency!!!!” Which is actually directly related to my fertility issues of having PCOS. So this journey y’all, it’s all about the SiMPLE. I’ve been taking iodine for 1 week and feel human again. God is simple! There’s nothing confusing or complicated about Him.
But there’s more…
Brian had two great interviews with the same company yesterday. He did awesome, they loved him, and I was so excited! But in the back of my mind, I didn’t want to feel excited, because what if it’s another let down? Yeah, that’s EXACTLY what the enemy wants me to think- don’t get excited because it probably won’t workout. I was talking to my friend at the gym this morning and told her that I just didn’t want to get my hopes up. She told me, hope is an anchor. You need to get your hope DOWN anchored in God and get your faith up! WOW! And God does it again!
So while I was doing the dishes, I was contemplating the graciousness of God. I’ve experienced a presence of God in these last several months in a way like I never have before. It further confirms in my heart and in my mind that we experience and learn more about the character of God in the valley and in the midst of the storm than we ever will on the mountain top! As for this valley, I am thankful. I wouldn’t be the person that I am today without it. Even our trials have an expiration date. I’ve felt from the beginning, in my heart, that I would receive my healing and Brian would receive his God-job all at the same time. I see it. I am feeling so good for the first time in a long time, and I just know that the job is almost here. In fact, since it’s been almost 9 months and I know that God has meaning in numbers, I looked up 9. Here’s what it said: “Used 49 times in Scripture, the number 9 symbolizes divine completeness or conveys the meaning of finality.” Click here for this great site!
I’m receiving Divine Completeness and Finality in me being healed and for Brian’s job that’s coming. So my faith is up, my anchor is down, and I’m trusting in Him!